It's been a whole year since i last logged in here to read my old postings. I forgotten how emo and sad i was back then, with roller coaster emotions all the time. I guessed i've learn alot from my pass happenings. Well here's the good news! I'm so much happier now! I accepted Jesus Christ!! went for water baptism last week 14th jan 2012 and now im a brand new person! forgiven for all my sins and i can rest my heart and soul on him. People asked why so sudden.. actually i've always wanted to go but due to some reasons somethings always holding me back.

above all these...

I've started working in the beginning of the year 2011 till now i'm still in the same company.. like woo hoo!!! longest of all lOl. And I'm currently dating my childhood friend too.. lol how amazing.. we use to be school mates, played hide and seek, catching, cycle and roller blade together back in primary school. Well as we all know every relationships have their own ups and downs.. feelings fade... unhappiness in the relationship.. no time for each other etc... but i'm glad that through out all hardships we still hold on to one another and he loves and cherish faithfully and can always talk and see things through. Blessed.


After all the happenings in my pass, the sadness, the emo and passings. I realize that most important thing in life is happiness and good health obviously money too lol (being realistic). Set myself a goal.. and work towards it. And since the start of this blog all those things in my wish list? Well I've cleard a few of them already!!!

*Nice Smooth Skin - well i'm currently happy with my skin
*Sg Driver License - PASSED!
*Heal In Time - The lord healed me!!!
*Freaking Loads Of $$$ Till I Lost Count - It's never ending lOL
*Marry A Good Man ;p - On the way soon! i hope (cross fingers)
*Nice And Comfortable Home - Got one with S.O
*White Beemer Convertible - eh i think this is a anytime thing if S.0 wans to get or not lol!


BLESSED!!!!

I'll try upkeep this happy good will sprite of mine and never shall i be depress until i have to go back mountE for my pills! WOOHOO! PRAISE THE LORD!

I may be down, but i'll get up again.

A new start and beginning.

Weep 4 hours last night... it hurt so bad that i just cant take it anymore! the pain is... am numb now. Thoughts of giving up on life and everything went into mine.... but then again it's silly.. why do i weep for someone so much when that person doesn't even care and has moved on. Well, the next bf of mine will defiantly be better. I'll make sure i'll not weep like this anymore I gotta be strong! yea talk is easy heh heh...

Anyhow... i've seen a light at the end of the dark tunnel i've always been lost in. All the best to me then.

A weeks time will be mums 1st yr death anniversary.... time some how pass me by so quickly again.

Hurray~!!!! passed my tp for the 1st time!!! hur hur hur now all i got to do is earn more money n get miself a vroom....

Well.. we ain't tgt anymore... sep 9th midnite.. the 1st month was hard.... and then i just gave up. Just hate the fact that he ignored me... i hated feeling so lost and unwanted its like what the hell... i gave and did everything i could but still he chose to ignore... i cant be waiting forever after all those years of waiting, i cant be holding back the pass 6yrs plus and be so miserable waiting... all i asked for in the past was for him to love and quickly marry me over cos i hate the fact that it was long distance... plus the ignore... i totally just lost hope... i cant take it anymore~!

Struggled alot.. but what don kill you makes you stronger... trying hard to forget am almost there i hope... if only SOMEONE pls KNOCK me out and the moment im awake i'll just forget bout everything.

But for all the heartace and tears i'll be back on my feet again! I don wanna be sucha loser for the rest of my life.... thinking that my prince charming will come take me away.. it all seems bullshit to me now..

P.s I don need a ring around my finger.

Whatever will be will be

Three cheers to the life im having right now. Stuck in between yet again. I don know which route to take. If only mum was around, would be alot easier, could ask for advice.

Having a blog back then was just for fun, Snap lotsa pictures and showing off what you have,had and went, but now it's actually helping me say what i can't say. Is it PMS? but there's a hurting feeling... weird mood swings.. things i wanna say but don know how to put it.. don know how to open my mouth it feels likes it's been glued.

If only things were way more easy...

My life's like a roller coaster ride. It brings me all the way up and drops me down in less then a second.

FML.

So it has been a few months since i last posted something. I've quited my mad rush job since april and have been living life to the fullest trying to enjoy and be happy all i can. S.O came during the early months of may and we went phuket together. It was so FUN!! and romantic, the view i had from my hotel room was breathe taking.. we went to the beach to chill... went phi phi islands to snorkel, and! i finally watch thaiger show ahaha at less i know whats it all about.

Now my current days are spent doing the house chores, exercise 2 3 times a week, shopping, tea, dinner with the girls. I seriously love it! Some people wont understand the privilege of doing so. Goodness did i not mention charmaine and me are no longer friends. 8 yrs down the drain. oh well whatever shall be then.

I've also started taking my driving lessons yay! haha learn the laws....

So far so good every things going great! living life to the fullest and i wont regret the choices i make. As time and distance has prove i still love S.O very very much and it's the purest thing ever just like when i was 16 only wanted to just be together. ( Bonus part is that i get what i want too lol) Some people wont get and understand why i want to be with him... his so controlsive and possessive and has given me a ridiculous curfew of 10,45pm. But hey~ i'm happy that's all that really matters right? So what if i din had a curfew.. i was not happy back then. I'd rather be now. No matter what people say or what harsh words they put, nothings gonna make me change my mind and feelings of wanting to be together with S.O (it's been proven)

This year has really pass quickly.. i still think of mom(duh), had dreams of her. But lucky for my happiness i don hurt that bad anymore. I think she would be happy seeing me happy now. I miss her.